Monday, September 29, 2008

No response?

We've all had this happen: you put the word out that something very exciting has taken place in your life, then sit back and wait.

Only... two hours later, there's nothing. No blinking lights on your telephone keypad. No flooding of emails in your inbox. No text messages. No call from your children, best-friend, or mother.

Nada.

So what do you make of that?

Are you unloved and unappreciated? Unimportant? Or just plain lousy at getting the word out?

It's a fast-paced world. I'm betting you'd be hard-pressed to find anyone who is totally so unimportant that nobody gives a hoot. Especially mum. And really, if all that were true, why would something exciting be happening to you in the first place?

Any chance you thought you clicked SEND, but it turns out that important message is in your DRAFT folder by mistake?

You've checked your DRAFT folder and, sadly, it's not there. The chances of everyone not finding the time to respond is slim. But not completely unlikely.

First of all, it's not personal. They aren't ignoring you. They're caught up in life's dramas, just as you are. They saw your message. They had a reaction. Good, bad, indifference. They just didn't (for reasons that probably have nothing at all to do with you) find the time to respond.

People care. That's why you're on their Facebook, Twitter, Gather, etc etc. That's why you're on the wedding list, maybe even in the wedding party. It's why you're invited to parties, dinners, barn raisings, and all those many other events you sometimes wish you weren't invited to.

However, if that all-important message ended up being sent to colleagues, people who don't necessarily adore you but who respect your contributions, not to mention your God-given talent, then chalk it up to lack of time. Nobody thinks they're the only one who can't respond at that precise moment. They're hoping if you don't see a message from them, you won't notice because you'll be swamped with messages.

Okay, that may not work if you posted you message on a public bulletin board, for everyone to see. If that's the case, maybe you are the most unimportant person you know. Just kidding. There are always reasons for a lack of response. You're new. Your timing is bad. Something momentous is happening at work, or on your list. Your little message was swallowed up by the bigger picture. Or everyone who didn't answer assumed everyone else replied privately.

Again, trust me, it's never personal.

For whatever reasons your message was missed, it doesn't matter. And it shouldn't stop you from ever posting again. Simply lift yourself up, brush yourself off, and next time somebody posts an announcement about something exciting taking place in their lives, take a moment and acknowledge them. Even a simple "Bravo" goes a long way.

And besides, it'll say volumes about you.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

Dead Witness Raffle

J. Kaye Oldner is raffling off a copy of my suspense thriller Dead Witness October 11th, 2008.

http://tinyurl.com/3nz6tq

Give it a shot. And good luck.

Friday, September 19, 2008

Book Giveaway : DEAD WITNESS

I'm extremely grateful for the wonderful response to my suspense thriller Dead Witness. When April asked me if I'd like to give a copy away, I jumped at the chance. If you know anyone who would like a free autographed copy of Dead Witness, or you'd like one for a gift, all you have to do is leave a comment on reviewer April Pohren's blog, blog about it and link back to her site for two entries! She will draw the winner on Sept. 24th..

http://cafeofdreams.blogspot.com/2008/09/book-giveaway.html

Good Luck!

Sunday, September 7, 2008

We May Have Something in Common...

The sun's shining, the lake is smooth like glass, people are fishing, water-skiing... but don't kid yourself, summer is over. Especially for those of us in the north. (We're in central B.C., but for the sake of argument, let's say "north" includes everywhere north of the mid-States) The end of summer means more cloudy days, cold weather, rain and finally five to six months of winter. No more warm, lazy days laying in the sun, sipping cold drinks with fancy names, and hearing children's laughter from the lake. The end of summer means that in short order we'll be shoveling snow, thawing our locks, and bungling up so tightly that bending over to tie up our boots is near to impossible.

A while back, the end of summer was my favourite time of year because it meant no more mosquitoes. And autumn was on its way. Everyone knows how beautiful autumn can be. The only downsize is that autumn is closely followed by winter. Winter, with its icy road conditions and snow that lasts until April. Oh, and let's not forget Christmas. Which reminds me that my second favourite day of the year used to be December 26th.

Ba humbug. It's not even Halloween and already I'm dreaming of sun-drenched days when working in the garden means I've really accomplished something for the day. Summer means mornings promising the eerie, spiritual cries of Loons calling to each other. Summer means sun rays shining oblong through the rain. Freshly clipped lawns. Peony bushes so full they bend over and touch the ground. And sparkling clean windows that seem to disappear. And let's not forget that summer doubles my living space by joining the outside with inside.

But the best part of all is that next year summer is preceded by spring, and spring means joining our youngest in the Dominican where he'll say his marriage vows.

I'm back from a visit with our youngest, who has just begun his tour in Afghanistan. His home is in Rusagonis, New Brunswick near Gagetown, where mosquitoes never die, but where summer sometimes lasts until Halloween. New Brunswick, like everywhere in the Maritime is a beautiful, history-filled place. While I am indeed sad to see summer end, I had the pleasure of an extended summer, mosquito bites et al. I spent time with our son and his beautiful fiancee. I was with her when he and his unit boarded their plane. I was there when the miracle of Skype enabled these lovebirds to speak face-to-face over the internet, a prelude to the next seven months.

Now, as I sit at my desk on a beautiful late-summer day, looking out at Cluculz Lake, watching fish jump, seeing fishermen putter past under clear skies ... there are over 33,000 Nato troops in Afghanistan. Among them 2,500 Canadians. I'm sure all those other parents are just as proud as I am that our son serves his country in the most bravest of ways. And I know that I'm not the only mum living now or in the past with this unease. And though I'm sad to see summer end, as each day passes, our son's end of tour draws closer.

Maybe the best thing about summer is its return again next year.


If your son or daughter is serving in Afghanistan or Iraq and you feel the need to share, please email me anytime. God Bless.