Wednesday, May 1, 2013

IWSG - Respect Yourself


Because today is the first Wednesday of the month, you know what that means -- YES, it's IWSG day, compliments of Alex J. Cavannaugh, our Ninja Captain!

It's a simple process:
"Post your thoughts on your own blog. Talk about your doubts and the fears you have conquered. Discuss your struggles and triumphs. Offer a word of encouragement for others who are struggling. Visit others in the group and connect with your fellow writer - aim for a dozen new people each time. Be sure to link to this page and display the badge in your post." 

Our Twitter hashtag is #IWSG
 

 Now for Joylene's titillating post:


  ~ ~ * ~ ~

Writing ain't easy. Novels, blogs, articles, posts, or even greeting cards come from sweat and tears and hair-pulling.



We certainly don't do this for the money.

Our bouts of happiness are fleeting.



When I was a kid, one of my chores was to clean the bathroom. I'd whine and complain, and my mum would say, "The bathroom isn't going to clean itself." When that didn't work, she'd add, "Clean the bathroom, you little brat--Or else!"

I never had to ask what the "Or else" was.


I can whine and complain about my current WIP or my attempt at marketing, or my writer's block...  but it all boils down to the same three things:

- writing ain't easy
- the book won't write itself
- writing is who I am
 

Then why am I sit playing Temple Run2 on my phone?



 Or watching House Hunters on HGTV?



I'd say I wasn't suffering from insecurities, but I'd be lying.



There's no solution to being a writer and being insecure.



But what if that "someone" is yourself?




69 comments :

  1. That one about treating others like shit is awesome!!!
    Things won't get done on their own. We have to take action and do it.

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  2. So I'm in total agreement about the writing but man I hate marketing. It's time I have to spend that I can't be writing or doing other things I'd rather be doing, and it's just not fun. Plus, I'm so not good at it.

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    1. Honestly, Beth, I have yet to meet an author who enjoys marketing. We're not meant to by our very nature. Thank God for blogging buddies!

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  3. You? Insecure? Nah, don't believe it!

    But I do believe the bathroom won't clean itself, heh heh.

    How ya doin', gal? You been Feeling Nosey?

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    1. Hi Nosey! Yup, I've been feeling very very nosey! Thanks for visiting, eh!

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  4. Hey Joylene,

    I know you gotta' believe in yourself. I reckon that writing can be a pretty lonely endeavour. Yet, I know you always get there and the words start flowing.

    And those that treat us like shit are often trying to mask their own securities by targeting others.

    I'm now feeling insecure. I really did think that "IWSG" meant "I Was Seeking Gary." I'm devastated! LOL

    Respect to you, eh.

    Gary

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    1. Honestly, Gary, it was suppose to be a secret. We're all secretly seeking Gary. You. And why wouldn't we??? I mean you're the best!

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    2. Right on and groovy, baby!

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  5. I had to laugh about the bathroom not cleaning itself, my mom used to say the same kind of thing to me about chores LOL.

    I needed to read this today as my WIP definitely isn't going to write itself so I need to stop wasting time playing Bejeweled and get to it. :D

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    1. Julie, don't feel bad. I haven't written a word. I generally don't on IWSG day because I'm snooping in so many posts. Thanks for the retweet!

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  6. Despite the bad reviews, the promotion fails, the editing woes, the complaining about all of it-- it really does seem like writers are harder on themselves than any one else is! What a wonderful reminder, to respect yourself! Respect your work too. And then move one.

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    1. I'm going to put the song on my ipod so I remember. Thanks, Karen. Your zucchini recipe sounds wonderful.

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  7. I meant "move on" not move one LOL.

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    1. We'll trying to sell our house, Karen, so I especially appreciate the word switch!

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  8. We are our own worse critic. We do need to be kinder to our creative selves. We need to be able to identify what we've done that's good too.

    I think readers get the idea that author's just sit down and write the whole story in one easy flow. Looks so simple, doesn't it?

    What they don't see is chapter 3-5 being rewritten four times to get the flow and words right. They don't see all the scenes cut by your editor, or request to add a different scene, or 4 pages of editorial suggestions for the next draft. Readers don't see the work, tears, hair pulling, cursing, our swearing "I'll never get this right", or "Whatever made me think I could write?" moments.

    But you're right, the story won't tell itself and in each story there is a nasty toilet or two to clean. :-)

    Sia McKye OVER COFFEE

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    1. There's also the opposite problem. Now that my friends realize how much is involved in my books, they forget to invite me to lunch. LOL. Yes, I'm making regular reminder calls.

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  9. I love House Hunters.

    Totally not what I was supposed to take away from this post, though, was it?

    ~MPL
    http://pepperwords.com

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  10. Ooo, I love house hunters! My mom used to say something along the lines of 'you can get to work now, get it over with and then do what you want, or you can fuss and whine and make it take much much longer than it needs to be." I find myself saying this to my kids. If they'd pick up their toys it would take two minutes but by the time they finish complaining about it half an hour has gone by.

    This happens in writing too. I can sit down and get something done, or I can sit and worry about whether or not I'm good enough and get nothing done. The thing is if I procrastinate enough, nothing gets done and then I'm definitely not good enough because I've got nothing. Of course here I am playing around on the internet during the half hour the kids are in bed. I should go get to work. :)

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    1. LOL. I'm laughing because I haven't written a word in my WIP today! Thanks, Sara!

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  11. Great post and fitting song, writers have to come to a point they respect they are writing if nothing else.

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    1. You're right. We're writing for a reason and that's worthy of respect. Thanks, Brandon.

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  12. Thanks, Joylene! And I loved Pop Staples. :)

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    1. Can you stay perfectly still when the they sing? LOL. I know! I can't either. Thanks, Linda!

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  13. Good post Joylene. I like the way you just think your thoughts out loud. Your procrastinations and self-doubts are so clearly admonitions we can all relate to. Thanks for sharing yourself with us. God bless, Maria at Delight Directed Living

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    1. I think it's part of the reason I'm here, Maria. I've always felt better helping than asking for help. But I'm also learning that asking is part of living. God Bless.

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  14. R-E-S-P-E-C-T.

    Fun post with a message. I love it! It is one of the few occupations I have pursued where the feedback is so personal, slow to come and the pay doesn't compensate for either of those pitfalls. But I love where I'm at in life!

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    1. That is awesome to hear, Julie. Bravo. Shout it loud, eh!

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  15. Loved this post, Joylene. Wish my bathroom would clean itself!

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    1. Me too, Suzanne! I wonder if Mr. King ever had to clean the bathroom?

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  16. Easier said than done, huh? I know that feeling. It helps to know we're not alone, though! :) Thanks, Joylene.

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    1. Much harder than I'll admit, Carrie. An ongoing battle that I refuse to give in to. Thanks, eh!

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  17. Stop whining and just write. Right. Got it. No. More. Whines. I promise. * crosses fingers behind back*.

    Great post. Thanks for the encouragement to stop doubting myself and hang in there.

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    1. Well, I just think us writers have to stick together. Besides, we can't let down our captain! Thanks, Ink!

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  18. I'm always amazed when accomplished writers (like yourself) express feelings of insecurity. Then I have to remind myself that, at the end of the day, you are simply human...
    Thanks for the reminder to have self respect!

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    1. Michelle, I think to be writers we have to be "sensitives" and that requires as much pain as it does joy. And some days we need to ignore the fact that the joy and the pain is out of balance. Thanks, eh!

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  19. Hey Joylene,

    I think you boiled it all down quite nicely. And this is such a vital lesson for me, that I need to constantly remind myself of. Because no one can crap on my parade as well as I can!

    Thanks for connecting with me!

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  20. Why DO you play Temple Run???? I can't get more than 80 meters on that game. Now Angry Birds is another story... ;)

    Lynda R Young
    IWSG co-host

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    1. I'm generally in a spin when I play the game, Lynda. That seems to help. LOL.

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    2. I think I'm getting too old for quick reflext/decision making games ;)

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  21. Writing isn't easy, that's for sure. I saw a quote on Facebook that said something like being a writer is like having homework every night for the rest of your life. Yup. That's about it! :)

    Had to laugh about cleaning the bathroom. My daughter used to complain about cleaning ours. Funny thing is, one of the jobs she had as an adult was cleaning houses. Now I can say I was giving her career training. :)

    Have a great rest of the week!

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    1. I cleaned houses during my time at university. It was excellent money and helped pay for all my books. Haha, never thought to thank my mum for the training. LOL. Thanks, Karen.

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  22. Well summed up. I agree that writing isn't easy but if you make it a habit it does get a little easier.
    Temple Run? Try stepping away from Hay Day! Now that's a challenge ;)

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    1. Uh-oh, sounds like there's another game I need to check out. LOL. thanks, Marta!

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  23. Would you step on the dream of a stranger? Why then step on your dream. JK Rowling was just a single mother dreaming at the start. Take a chance. It is the stuff of miracles, right?

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  24. What a fun and uplifting post! I think we all need a little self talk every now and then.

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    1. Thanks, Natasha. Hey, have fun at the writer's conference.

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  25. Yes, writing is such hard work as compared to cleaning the bathroom, lol. The best advice I ever read was to finish the book! Hmm...that's hard when you love revising just a little too much.

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    1. Me too, Denise. I find revising the best part! Thanks, eh!

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  26. Hi, visiting from the IWSG. Writing ain't easy, getting published is even more difficult. And finally marketing can drain us of our remaining energy.

    Rachna Chhabria
    Co-host IWSG
    Rachna's Scriptorium

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  27. You're right--this stuff isn't easy, and books don't write themselves. Still, it's important to take a break every once in a while and rest those creative muscles so they don't get strained :)

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    1. Sadly, I do a lot of rest time, Lara. I've got to discipline myself! Thanks for visiting.

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  28. Love it, Joylene. :D You're an awesome writer. It just goes to show it doesn't matter what your level of skill is, everyone still has the same doubts and fears!

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    1. Amen, dear Sandhya. That's why I like hanging out with you. I figure you'll rub off on me. Thanks, eh!

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  29. I loved, loved, loved this post! The pics you chose were wonderful! I thought I was the only procrastinator out there. I'll let you in on a secret: despite the fact I now have an agent, I'm still a big swirlng mass of insecurities and have no idea what the heck I'm doing. I guess it's a permanent state of being. Best of luck dealing with your own procrastination and insecurities, and thanks for making me smile with your adorable post. :-)

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    1. Ah, Lexa, thanks! I surprise myself sometimes. LOL.

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  30. This is a REALLY great post! I liked the part where you talked about playing Temple Run 2 (I myself am obsessed with that game). Keep strong and always remember to respect yourself.

    www.modernworld4.blogspot.com

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    1. Gina, that's great to hear. I'm driving myself nuts trying to pass the 8th level, the millionaire level. Yikes!

      Thanks, Gina.

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  31. Girl! You are too funny! Don't doubt yourself...even while playing on your phone games!

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  32. Poor Gary thought that "IWSG" meant "I Was Seeking Gary." I believe he's devastated!

    Sorry, couldn't think of anything else to say!

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    1. Dang, Wendy, I almost had him convinced that it does mean that, but we had to change it for fear he'd be a target for stalkers. But the truth leaked out. Yes, the poor fellow is devastated. Ooy!

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