Saturday, October 18, 2014

FNN Report: New Reality Show Revealed

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FNN entertainment reporter Mia Diversion had an exclusive interview with independent TV producer, Pom Posity. Mr. Posity told Mia he had a new reality show in production called "The Widower". In it, a dozen widows peruse a widower and try to win his hand. The youngest of the contestants is seventy-two. The oldest is eighty-one. The entire show is filmed live in Atlantic City.

"This is great stuff," Mr. Posity said. "Hilarity breaks out when the 'girls' get feisty and competitive. One of them uses her walker to stomp on another's instep. A second uses her cane to trip other contestants. And to top that, two of the widows imitate the knights of yore by tilting with each other using their powered wheelchairs instead of horses and canes instead of lances and swords. The jousting takes place in the hallway of the hotel."

Ms. Diverison asked Mr. Posity what happens after the widower picks one of the widows.
"Everyone will love this ending. After the widower picks the winner, the two of them will retire to the honeymoon suite to take a nap and rest up for their big night. It starts off with an Early Bird Special in a four-star restaurant followed by a few rounds of cut-throat bingo at a local church. Finally, their action packed night concludes with two hours of free play at the penny slots at the casino of their choice.

Mia Diversion caught up Amy Bigelow, one of the widows who said, "I don't give a fig about the old geezer. I'm in it for the free slot play."

Ms. Diversion will issue a follow up report with the name of the winner.



Hank Quense is the author of 50 published short stories along with four novels and three collections of stories. All of these are humorous and/or satiric scifi and fantasy. In the non-fiction area, he has over a dozen articles published on fiction writing and he's the author of the Fiction Writing Guides series and the Self-publishing Guides series. Both series consist of a number of ebooks. The Fiction Writing Guides and the Self-Publishing Guides are an outgrowth of his lectures on both subjects.
Strange Worlds OnlineHank's Amazon PageHank's Blog PageSelf-publishing Guides

43 comments :

  1. Given the number of 'young-at-heart' viewers watching TV from their recliners, this show could really hit the top of the charts. Hank could be backing a winner. ;)

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    1. LOL. You have a point, Carol. I can see it now: me and the ole guy rocking to the theme music.

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  2. Ms Diversion just found out the show plans to feature Lawrence Welk records

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  3. At that age, I doubt many of the widows actually want to win the widow...

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    1. the big attraction isn't the guy, it's the free slot machine play. Irresistible to many widows.

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  4. Is there a cash bonus if they're both still alive in the morning?

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    1. Free breakfast is the best they can hope for

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    2. Good point, Diane. Free panty liners for a month!

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  5. The funny thing is, I bet this would have an audience! ;)

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    1. I'm sure it would. It could even be more entertaining than the stuff that is currently on TV

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    2. I bet my aunt would watch. She watches everything!

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  6. I agree that it would be interesting to see what the elders have up their sleeves. They're an interesting lot and probably have more tricks than the young and the restless.

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    1. I bet they're up to no good, Cheryl. Those elderly persons are a sneaky bunch.

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    2. The little old ladies are a vicious lot when it comes to slot machines, especially the penny machines. I avoid them when I'm in Atlantic City.

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  7. There are some mighty strange reality shows out there. This one sounds mild by comparison ;)

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    1. Yes, that is right, Lynda. But not be fooled by their innocent demeanour. They're a crafty bunch.

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  8. You know, we used to live 40 minutes from Atlantic City and I do not remember hearing about these events. However, it is apparent that we subscribed to the wrong newspaper. Will have to send word to family in NJ to look up Ms. Diversion's paper.

    Enjoyed the post. Thanks so much! :)

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    1. LOL, thanks, Karen. Hope you find her.

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    2. Remember, Karen. Faux News Network makes it up so you don't have to. It's a free service FNN provides.

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  9. Oh my goodness... Wow. That's insane and hilarious all in one. My hubby doesn't like reality shows and it's a good thing he doesn't, because I would totally be glued to the TV otherwise. =)

    Unleashing the Dreamworld

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    1. Me neither. Which probably addresses my weight issues. When I get together with my girlfriends, the first 40 minutes is them discussing the latest stats and me munching on all the goodies.

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  10. This is too funny. I used to live 45 minutes away from Atlantic City so I know exactly how the senior citizens love their slots. My grandmother being one of them! I should tell her about this reality show, ha!

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    1. Yes, and then remind her that Hank makes up the news so we don't have to.

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  11. Gina: If your grandmother wants to be on the show, she'll have a lot of competition. Free slot play does draw a crowd

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  12. Reality TV at its near worst. Not my kind of entertainment, but it is a funny write-up.

    Have a good weekend Joylene.

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    1. I think some of the reality shows I see advertised on TV are worse than this new one. Just saying

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    2. I see their commercials and shake my head, yet, many of my friends and family watch those shows. I don't get it.

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  13. I loved reading this post! Sounds fun!

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    1. Thank you, but you shouldn't encourage me, because there's no telling what I'll come up with next.

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    2. We love you stopping by to read it, Romance!

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  14. This is toooo funny! I laughed all the way through. Out loud. (so lucky to be home alone at the moment)
    But a show like this would really work. And for extra fun, the producers should "plant" one of the widows, someone who will really wreak havoc...that would send ratings through the ceiling!
    I think Hank is onto something here.

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    1. I love how your mind works, Michelle!

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    2. Thanks Joylene!
      Now to apply it to my WIP...

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  15. Thank you Michelle. I'm thinking of a Kickstarter program to raise money for the show.

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  16. Carefree elders are the best. Very funny!

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  17. Hey Joylene and Hank!

    Yes, eh, it's actually me visiting your must-read blog, Joylene. Its been ages since I graced your site with one of my award winning comments. Which means, you might have to wait a bit longer for another one of my award winning comments.

    So, what's happening? Aha, I note the illustrious chap, Hank, has made another noteworthy contribution to your site. " ..a dozen widows peruse a widower and try to win his hand." Yep, just his hand cause the rest of him aint working too good....

    Nice one, Hank. You are da bestest n'stuff!

    See ya later, eh, Joylene!

    Gary

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